It’s 3 am and I have to be up at 8. I’m awake and excited, as always, because I started writing a new book today… or maybe it was yesterday, I’m not sure. When you keep weird hours the days blend together.

So, new book, right. It’s called Blood Nymph, and I already have a gorg cover for it and I know exactly when it takes place in Jane’s life and pretty much what happens. The only rub is that I’m going away to visit my sister and niece 3 states away tomorrow, which is why I have to be on the road at 9.

So, I’m gonna do an experiment. I’m gonna see how much I can write while not in my comfy office.. and I’ll start it off by writing in the car. Yup, while my husband drives us to North Carolina, I’ll be banging away the first draft of Blood Nymph. Or, at least, I’ll be trying to. I’ve no idea if I can write in a moving car.

Facebook reminded with a picture (you KNOW I got a picture of me with the Queen of UF herself!) and now I’m gonna tell you about it.

In case you don’t know who Kim Harrison is – because you’ve been living on Mars or something – let me start by saying she is probably my biggest influence when it comes to the craft of writing. I remember reading through  Pale Demon and needing to stop because her prose was so expertly crafted. The flow and artistry in her writing… it’s something I aspire to every time I sit down to write.

That said, Kim Harrison is a New York Times bestselling author most known for The Hollows (Rachel Morgan) series. She’s also written in other genres like Epic Fantasy with her Truth Series, Young Adult with Madison Avery, and recently she’s gotten into Thrillers with her new Peri Reed Chronicles series.

Yes, I am a fan. No, I’m not ashamed.

The world she created in The Hollows was one of the first in the Urban Fantasy genre I’d ever read and I was such a rabid fan I recruited other people to join in on the KH kool-aide.

So, after making sure I had off from the day job, a feat that almost squashed the whole adventure, a friend and I drove the 40 or so miles to meet her.

We dressed up as characters from the series, me as Ivy, the vampy sidekick, and my friend as Rachel, the quirky lead. It worked out great cause I’m already a little vampy so I already had the clothes. But, it was JANUARY, and while I looked the part of a vampire, I FROZE MY POOR TOES OFF!

Anyway, I was nervous. The kind of stupid-making nervous you get when meeting your idols. This is pretty much how our exchange went.

Me: “Stutter, stutter, blubber, blubber, slur-every-word-you-know-into-one-long-sentence.”
Kim: “What’s that?”
Me tugging awkwardly at my full length, purple-lined leather coat: “This is my best attempt at Ivy.”
Kim: “You look great!”

Right there I died a little bit.

And the rest was a blur. She signed my book, she put a cute message in it and we took a picture. I didn’t tell her I wrote because at that time I was really only dabbling, and I didn’t tell her I thought her writing was amazing, or how much I loved her work. Really, I just focused on forming coherent sentences. But the rest of the night I was high on endorphins and adrenaline and MEnoETING KIM HARRISON!

But the rest of the night I was high on endorphins and adrenaline and MEETING KIM HARRISON!

Oh, oh! I almost forgot. Notice how we both have the same hair color? Yeah, that was neat – except hers was a wig and mine was from a bottle.

My head gets full of ideas and dialogue and beautiful cover images – usually as soon as I put my head on the pillow –  and then I don’t sleep for an entire weekend.

I spend the day like the living dead, not really seeing or comprehending much, not able to write and get all the shit in my brain out so I can sleep – just drifting from room to room, or tab to tab – only roused from my not-actually-awake haze when the cat meows directly in my face that he needs to be fed.

And all that only makes me feel like a fraud. Like a girl just playing at this writing thing because who can’t keep normal hours? Who can’t control their muse well enough to go the fuck to sleep? Who gets so excited about books they haven’t even plotted, books that are 3 books in the future? Who does that? And why can’t you JUST BE NORMAL?!

So I beat myself up about it. I intentionally make myself feel bad for it, which when you think about it is absolutely ridiculous and I’m not doing it anymore. No more. I’m weird. I write weird shit and sometimes I keep weird hours. And I won’t make myself feel guilty about it anymore.

Well, actually, I’m doing a thing.

Do you know what that is? That’s the title card for my…youtube channel! I’m excited to drop a BUNCH of content! Also a little worried that I maybe bit off more than I could chew with ANOTHER project…but we’ll see!!

In other news…

Jane 2 is nearly done. I just need to tweak some things and come up with a title … then it’ll be all yours!!!!

It’s 12:59 AM and I’m not going to sleep tonight.

My book SEX MAGIC just went live on Amazon, and I do not feel any of the ways I expected to. I’m not happy, or excited, or anything

I worked so long and so hard. I expected I’d feel some sense of satisfaction. But I don’t

I’M A FUCKING NERVOUS WRECK!!!

My stomach is in knots. Every time I think about I get a little bit queasy.

I opened a single serving bag of Cheetos and COULDN’T FINISH THEM.

But…I finished it. It’s done and I’m really proud of it. There were times when I thought I wouldn’t ever get it done. And there were LOTS of times when I got in my own way – when I kept myself from getting it done. But I can’t say that anymore. It’s done.

I hope you love Zora. She was difficult to write. I knew how she was supposed to be, but I often didn’t think I had the writing chops to portray her. She was criticized by many critique partners and ripped apart by an editor – and I really hope I was able to do her justice.

I hope you laugh at the funny parts, are moved by the sad ones, and get turned on by the sexy ones.

I hope you like it enough that you want to read the next in her tale.

I love you all

There’s still a lot to do.

I’ve been riding the high of creation. Freebies, website, newsletters–all of those lovely little darlings offer a welcomed distraction. It’s so easy to get lost in a world of your making, in the creative process. And it’s very tempting, as a creative type, to stay in the space of newness and birth, never really finishing anything.

I have life excitement.  The bubbling, champagne-belly feeling you get when you’re so ready for all the things you’ve been planning to come together and actually exist. The busy mind chatter that keeps you up at night by listing all the ways you could do all the things you’re so eager to do the next day.

All of those lovely new, creative, inspiring things  keep me from doing what I actually need to be doing. Going over the proofed copy of SEX MAGIC.

But all of those lovely new things are useless without a book to sell.  Sooooo…..

I’ll be cleaning off my desk, and cranking out the last of the proofs. Unless I get distracted by pretty, pretty cover art.

Got up at the crack of noon. Had lunch with my engineer, and now I’m back at it. Edits ARE fun. They ARE!

I really missed this

and you

I really missed you

For those of you that have been with me from the beginning-

Thank you. It’s been rough. It’s been really hard trying to get this thing back on its feet after I’d let it waste away for so long.

Why you ask? Why did I let it wither and starve from neglect?

I fell in love. The storybook kind. The oh-holy-shit-this-man-is-gonna-change-my-whole-life kind of love. I fell in love and I couldn’t balance everything. I wanted to, I felt guilty about leaving it in the damp, dusty corner of the back of my mind. But that’s what happened.

Big stuff is coming. BIG. Hope you enjoy!